Gender & Pronouns: Making Inclusion in K-12 classrooms the norm
For those of you who have children who identify as another gender or no gender at all, you know how important it is to use proper pronouns and their preferred name over their deadname. However, many of you might not have a child who identifies as trans, nonbinary or gender non-conforming. Your child might just be born as male and identifies as male, also known as cisgender. There is most likely a student in your child’s class that does have a gender identity crisis and their feelings matter as much as your own child’s feelings. According to CDC data 2% of high schoolers identify as trans or non-binary.
Opinions aside on the topic of gender, it is important that EVERY student that walks into a classroom feels safe. It is important for their mental health, their ability to perform academically and their ability to socialize and make friends. With this being said it is important to include gender and pronoun uses in our ice-breaking activities. If you had a child that has a disability you would want them to be included just as much as the child who doesn’t, this is no different for those who have gender identity issues. They want to feel as normal as the kid sitting beside them. One way to do this is just to make it a norm to include pronouns and names when we do our first day of school activities known as ice-breakers. In the professional world including gender and pronouns is becoming normal.. so why don’t we normalize it for our kids?
Teachers should be educated on gender dysphoria and what a child experiences when this occurs. Suicide prevention has become a great topic in schools, especially amongst middle school and high schools. According to the CDC‘s 2020 data in schools using the “Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance”, the results state that 35% of transgendered youth and those with gender identity issues had attempted suicide in 2019. Another alarming statistic is that 43% of transgendered or gender identity students were bullied in the classroom or on school property. The data even suggests that the violence and hate crimes against the LGBTQIA+ community in schools has increased from 2015 data by 3%. Meaning that our schools are becoming more dangerous for students in this community, even though it is becoming more accepted in the mainstream world.
No parent, myself included, wants their child to go to school every day and be afraid that they will be victim of bullying or even worse, a hate crime. Schools need to start holding the students accountable. Many schools do not hold students accountable for their actions at all, no matter what the offense is. The main reason for this is because schools get paid by attendance, so if they suspend Jimmy for a week for beating up Tommy, then the school loses money. As an educator I have witnessed this first hand. We have a broken system, with no real solution ahead of us. No student should feel so bad about themselves that at the end of the day that they want to take their own life. Many schools claim to have an anti-bullying policy, yet bullying continues to be a major problem that extends outside of the classroom and into social media. The students who are getting bullied are getting bullied all day long, 24–7.
The non-existent system for protecting students with gender identity/ dysphoria needs to end. We need to advocate for a system that includes all kinds, all genders.. after all, we are all human beings. Teachers need to become educated on this subject matter. Many teachers feel uncomfortable using pronouns that were not assigned at birth. It is sad, but some school districts and school boards across the nation will ask teachers to avoid using pronouns at all with these students. It is imperative that schools use inclusion practices to make these students feel safe. Schools and Teachers should understand the importance of proper use of pronouns with a child. They should understand that not using them can further the gender dysphoria that their student has. They should understand that the suicide rate of these teens is drastically higher than that of a cis-gendered teen. Schools need to work with parents to get the deadname off of the classroom list that the teachers inherit. I also think that is just as important that families should know the rights that they have under FERPA and advocate for their students.
Under federal law, you have the right to request that your school change your child’s name and gender marker on your records if you feel they are incorrect, misleading, or violate your privacy. (34 C.F.R. § 99.7(a)(2)(ii)). FERPA also states that no educational institution shall be granted funding if it does not provide parents and/or students a hearing process through which they can challenge the content of school records, insure that the records are not inaccurate, misleading or otherwise in violation of the privacy or other rights of students, and receive an opportunity for the correction or deletion of any such inaccurate, misleading, or otherwise inappropriate data contained therein. (34 C.F.R. §§ 99.7(a)(2)(ii), 99.21).
Help me break the norm. Let’s educate teachers and schools on this topic. If we don’t advocate for it, who will?
Image Credit to CDC 2017 Youth Risk Behavior Survey of high school students.
